It's like a disease...

As I probably mentioned, this past week was CRAZY.  Yesterday morning one of the counselors and I made plans to actually go out of the building and have lunch (usually I have at least 6 students in my room during lunch).  Just as I kicked all of my students out of my room, my supervisor walked in (we have 3 prep periods a day and yet she insists on either coming while I'm teaching or during lunch to give me more work to do).  Anyway, when I was finally able to escape, we went to this delicious little sandwich place and sat and talked.  I realized that I would never be able to do her job.  I've been seeing my job lately as part teacher and part counselor, but for me, when I start to worry about the students' lives and everything they have to deal with outside of school, I can focus on helping them do well in school since that is something that is within my "locus of control."

Apparently, pregnancy is going around like an epidemic in our school all of a sudden.  Another one of my students, Amy, just found out she is pregnant.  Amy is the student whose mother calls about 1000 times a week, and she hasn't told her mother yet.  Looking forward to that phone call!  Carolyn is due in January, and  I'm really worried for her! She's already not doing well in her classes, I can only imagine what next semester will be like.  

Five Pointz Field Trip and Pumpkin Carving Photos

Excited to be getting out of class

Mural Club Artists

Me and the art teacher

Pumpkin Carving

"Monique" and her purple wig...I can't figure out how to rotate pictures in this blog, sorry!

Carolyn and her "favorite acquaintance" 

RC- one of Mr. B's resource room kids, never without a smile on his face, and always looking to give  lots of hugs

Mostly my French club kids

We brought all the pumpkins upstairs and left them on Mr. V's desks.  I was lucky enough to get to see him this morning as he walked into his classroom to this... 

End of Midterms Week

"Ms. C, you know, it really bothers me when people think that resource means we're dumb.  I think it's great. It just means we need a little help to stay focused and all...we're lucky!  Like, have you heard the word 'special education'?  That's not us is that?  Because that makes us sound like we're stupid or something, and a lot of people say they want to get out of resource, but I would never want out of resource!"

JT said this to me after school today as he was finishing his global midterm, and my heart actually broke a little.  I had a good long talk with him about what an IEP is and how students end up with them and why some students just don't understand because no one has ever explained it to them.  He was also really bummed today because he got kicked off the basketball team since he's failing 2 classes, so I promised I'd help him work towards getting his grades up so he could get back on the team.  I'm actually really glad that happened, I think it'll be a good reality check to get him back into gear.

Midterms week is almost over, and as hectic as it has been, it's also been really...interesting.  I haven't gotten a single one of my prep or lunch periods all week, and I've had some students in my classroom 4 or 5 periods a day.  I'm getting to see their personalities come through more and more.

I don't think I've ever mentioned Monique in this blog because she's not a huge character in my class, but I realized this week that if I was still in high school, I would want her to be my best friend.  She's like a big sweet mom, and every once in a while she throws you this hysterical sarcastic comment that makes you just want to give her a big hug.  I'm really worried about her because she's currently failing a bunch of classes, and she is not one of my students that goofs off and doesn't do the work.  She's my only student not classified as LD (learning disability).  Monique's classification is TBI (traumatic brain injury).  Though I don't know the story behind what happened, she is perfectly perfectly normal, it just takes a longer for her to take notes and process information, and I think most of her classes move a little too quickly though.  I absolutely adore her for her patience and am realizing that I really need to find a way to keep her up to speed!

 I also just found out that I am in the weekly TFA digest under "corps member spotlight"!  Check it out!

(way way way at the bottom) Teach for America Weekly Digest 10/28/2010

yay!!!

All of my students that took the Algebra 3 midterm passed!!!!  The lowest grade was a 72 (Arnelle, who literally caught up on 2 weeks of info in 2 hours), and the highest was 100 (JT!!!).  When JT showed me I actually cried.  He was so happy, and I spent the whole day following him around and making him tell all the other teachers how well he did.

Today was also a mural club trip to 5 pointz graffiti lot in Queens and we had a pumpkin carving party after school, so I have pictures to post soon!

Past my Bedtime

I dread Thursdays every week, because I have grad school on the Upper East Side from 7-9:15.  Since the earliest I can leave school is 4:30, I don't have enough time to go home before class, so I stay late and do work, go to class, and don't get home until around 10:30/11pm....and lately I've been so exhausted I fall asleep before 10!  It's almost 11 and I think I'm only still up because I had to have a ton of coffee to make it through class.  I'm going to be a zombie tomorrow.

After my slightly depressing entry today, I had to make a quick post because I am so proud of two of my students today.  Arnelle, as I mentioned, is finally back, and she's shown a lot of initiative in catching up on everything she missed.  She came during lunch and stayed for an hour and a half with me after school today.  We worked on Biology (together, because I had no idea what was going on in Biology) and she caught up on about 3 or 4 days worth of Algebra in a half hour.  Without me even saying anything I heard her tell one of her friends she "learned her lesson and isn't going to miss any more school."  I also made her a "to do list" for tonight (things to study/review before she can make up a few of the 7 or 8 quizzes/tests she missed while she was gone), and I'm excited to see if she actually does it (I have a good feeling she will).  I think this one small little victory was something I really needed to show me that sometimes I do make a difference, even if it's just a little!

Cristy, who I haven't mentioned a ton in this blog, has also made me really happy the past few days.  She is currently failing Algebra and English (she has so much trouble with Math especially), but she's been working so so hard and watching all the Algebra concepts we were working on during the midterm review today finally click with her made me happier than I could express in words! I'm just really nervous because I would have sworn that she would get an A or B on the last math test, and she got a 65.  It'll break my heart if that happens on the midterm too.  I know she knows it, but for some reason a lot of my students freeze up on the tests.

Underwhelmed

A lot of my fellow TFA-ers seem to be drowning right now in the amount of work they have to do right now...lesson planning, making tests, grading papers, checking homework, etc.  For me, the only way I can describe how I've felt is underwhelmed.  I don't have tests to give or grades to track...and half of the lessons I write I have to throw out the window last minute when I find out that there's a big test coming up in one of their classes or I realize half my students don't know their multiplication tables.  It sounds ridiculous, to complain that I don't have enough to do, but it's more that I'm feeling a little helpless.  

My role as a teacher is so undefined.  I don't teach one particular subject, so I feel like it's my job to make sure my students do well in all of their subjects.  This would be perfectly reasonable if I taught a self-contained class and I saw these kids all day, but I only see them one or two periods out of the day! Not to mention how difficult it is for me to know what they are doing in Science, History, and English at all times when I am never in those classes.   I need to narrow down the focus of my class so we're not so all over the place (especially since there is no possible way I could help them with biology or chemistry anyway), but I still haven't quite figured out how to do this.  

On a somewhat lighter note, today's "Do Now" was "Write about what you imagine your life will be like 10 years from now."  Second period talked about how they wanted to be vets, lawyers, basketball players, therapists, etc.  Seventh period: "I'm going to be a drug lord and make mad money.  No seriously, you need to know chemistry and math to be good at that.  Those are the only two classes I'm passing."  This, by the way, was the first time Jay has ever actually done the Do Now.

The rest of the period I fought to get them to prepare for midterms.  Jack (who, as tough as he pretends to be, is a big teddy bear), spent the period trying to come up with names for Carolyn's baby, and JT took the highlighter I gave him to help him focus on his test and drew little yellow polka dots all over his entire history test (this was the third day he was working on the test).  Arnelle is finally back in school after being absent for almost two weeks, and I realized today that she went from passing all of her classes to only passing gym and Resource (which doesn't even count as a credit for graduation).  Midterms are next week, and grades are due on the 31st.  There are no words to describe how nervous I am for my students!!

Last week in a nutshell

I proctored the PSATs for my 13 students in a separate room.  I had four IEP annual reviews the next day, so I was working on writing one of them while they were taking the test.  I look up to see Dennis, who is usually a perfectly behaved gentleman in my class, standing next to his desk, in the middle of stripping.

Me: DENNIS. WHAT are you DOING?
Dennis:  *Stops before taking his shirt off, looking shocked, shrugs* What? It's hot in here.

*Later*
Denis:  Miss, I don't mean to disrespect, but Carolyn is flicking boogers at me.
Carolyn:  *Looks at me with a huge, guilty smile, with her fingers 2 inches away from her nose*  No I wasn't...

In the middle of perfect silence JT shouts out:  "I'M FRESH!" and then farts loudly.

*The next day*
Me: Carolyn, tell Mr. L (the counselor) what you were doing yesterday when you were supposed to be taking the PSAT
Carolyn:  I was picking my nose and throwing it at Dennis
Mr. L: Carolyn, you still do that? What did we talk about last year?

Me: Dennis, what got into you yesterday?
Dennis: I think I had too much candy.

Cristy: Miss, you need a boyfriend.
*Rest of class gets off topic and begins to brainstorm*

*After her IEP Review*
Carolyn: That  HAG made me feel like I was retarded (referring to my supervisor, who really was talking to her like she was two)

Me:  I'm very impressed with how silently Jay is working right now, he's the only one on-task
JT: YEAH that's because he has his headphones on!
Jay: Snitch!

When students rebel.....give them dodgeballs.

I can’t believe I didn’t post all week…it was a very eventful week! Every week goes by in such a blur (but at the same time many days feel like 6 days in one) so it’s pretty hard to remember what went on. But I’ll give you the highlights.

Wednesday was the only day I’ve had so far that I would describe as “horrible.” The math teacher I co-teach with was out, as were a few other teachers, so I was covering the math classes and the English teacher’s advisory. In Algebra we were reviewing for a test, and I basically have no authority in that class, so it was a little crazy, and I actually had to count down from 5 to get them to settle down (I’ve only ever done that before with elementary school kids, and I told them that!) After my 7th period, Carolyn came to me with the counselor and they told me Jay was saying inappropriate things to her in my class, even from the other side of the room, and I realized that that is why she keeps avoiding my class. I felt horrible, because I had no idea, and I should really know what’s going on in an 8-student class…

Normally on Wednesdays the students have half days, but instead of letting them go home they had to stay and take practice ACT exams. They were pissed. In the advisory that I covered it, it took me a good 10 minutes to get them to sit quietly enough to pass out the test, and they all complained incessantly about how it was stupid and they didn’t want to take it. Many refused and went to sleep, some didn’t even open up the test book and just randomly filled in bubbles, and one boy and girl got into a verbal screaming fight out of no where and I had to kick them out. I wrote my 2nd, 3rd, and 4th write-ups that day.

Thursday I started 7th period by lecturing my students about how I no longer wanted to hear any racists or disrespectful comments, or it was going to be automatic detention. They laughed because apparently I was “looking at Jay” the whole time I was talking about it. But then they were amazing for the rest of the period! JT has taken to dragging his desk to face the wall so he can concentrate (without me telling him to!) and Jordan started doing it too! Baby steps…

Friday during lunch my supervisor came with all this paperwork I have to do by next Wednesday. Ever since I told my students that she was my “boss,” they’ve decided they don’t like her. A few of them were in my classroom during lunch working on tests, and one of them (God only knows why) happened to have a small beach ball with him. He stood behind her and pointed at her head, mouthing to me and motioning with the ball, “Should I hit her with it?!” It was so hard for me to look at her and not laugh. I love that my kids are looking out for me.

After school we had a teacher vs student dodgeball tournament. I volunteered to videotape it so they wouldn’t pressure me into playing. Funniest thing I have ever seen, 20 teachers vs 50-60 students. And the students lost.

Back to School Night

Friday was a "professional development day," which meant we had no students and were supposed to spend the day at workshops and meetings and such.  Instead, we had a 10 minute meeting at 9am, and spent the rest of the day doing whatever we needed (planning, organizing, bulletin boards, etc).  We also blew up 300 balloons and decorated the hallways for Back to School Night (the parents were all supposed to come from 6-8pm to meet all the teachers).  It was a really great day for bonding with all of my co-workers, but I was also was pretty much working non-stop from 9am-9pm.  I found out that 4 of my students have their "annual IEP review" coming up on October 14th, so I ran around all day trying to track down forms and get them filled out and reserve a room for the meeting.  The other Special Ed teacher was out for Jury Duty, so I also had to prepare for his and my student's parents.

When it actually came time to meet the parents, only 3 of my students' parents showed up.  Luckily, Jay's mom and stepdad came (so did Jay, and when he saw me in the hallway he shook my hand. I was floored).  His parents came into my room and said, "Okay, don't sugarcoat anything, just let us know what he's been doing and what he has to do.  We were told that no one fails resource room, and yet Jay is failing."  It was fantastic, and hopefully he will start to get better.